NY Life

“Ladies, seamen! 12 o’clock!” shouts Samantha to her girlfriends Carrie, Charlotte, and Miranda. “I pray when I turn around there are sailors, because with her, you never know,” Miranda replies with snark. Relive the classic Sex and the City episode “Anchors Away” with your girlfriends this Memorial Day Weekend and stick around town in order to catch a glimpse (or perhaps a little more) of some hunky Fleet Week sailors.

We don’t want to make it obvious that we want in on some sailor attention, so the best bet is to make sure you’re in the right place at the right time. Get wardrobe approval from your gals and head down to Pier 90 & 92 on 51^st Street and the West Side Highway on Saturday with your besties where, from 8am-5pm, Free Ship Tours will be taking place. Snoop around your future fling’s bunk as he hangs on the dock nearby and smiles at you as you pass.

Invite the cutie in uniform to bring some friends along as he joins you and your girlfriends for a group movie date. What’s more romantic than a good flick outdoors, under the stars? Rooftop Film Summer Series presents Kumaré Saturday evening @ 8PM on the Open Road Rooftop on the Lower East Side. You’ll splurge for the movie tickets as long as he opts to take you all out for drinks after.

Now that you have a new (and hot!) gang to hang with for the weekend, gather your girlfriends and call up your sailors. Treat them first to a morning of country pride in Times Square (I know, who goes to Times Square? Just remember, these guys are from our of town – they’ll love the tourist trap!) where Military Bands march and play while vets and service members alike crowd around to cheer for America from 2PM-5PM.

Now that the torment is over, on to the fun! Since these guys are stuck on a boat all day, I’m sure they are well attuned to all things video games. Therefor, they will love you for the next event you’re taking them to – the New York City Zombie Bar Crawl! Grab some cheap red face paint (or lipstick) and add a dash of blood to fit in with the undead impersonators as you participate in the 6^th Annual Zombie Crawl starting at 3:30, hoping from bar to bar and ending at an after-party at the Public Assembly with Rigor Mortis Revue’s horror burlesque.

Phew! It’s not easy keeping up with those guys. Time to recover on Monday, the final day of your long weekend of fleeting bliss. Soak up the last day with your sailors as your head for a late picnic in the East River Park (you’re going to need to sleep in after the bar crawl!). Celebrate Memorial Day traditionally and claim one of the park’s six public grills as you watch your man grill up some burgers and corn on the cob. The views of the water, sweet smell of barbecue, and hunky seamen will make for one unforgettable Memorial Day.

With New Yorkers out of town for Memorial Day weekend, they courteously allowed you and your girlfriends first dibs on the sea’s hottest sailors during Fleet Week. Unfortunately, everything good must come to an end but it was fun while it lasted and hey, there’s always next year! In the words of Carrie Bradshaw, “That’s why I love New York. Just like that, it can go from bad to cute.”

By Caitlin Colford

What Central Park looked like today yesterday, don’t wait for the weekend, Saturday it’s going to rain.

It’s the oldest April Fools joke in the book: “I won the lottery!!!” You’ll scream it over the phone and type it in caps to your most gullible friends and family members, hoping someone will hook the bait to provide you with a good chuckle. Tonight the Mega Millions Lottery is at a record high, providing the lucky S.O.B. with the winning numbers with a jaw dropping 540 million dollars. So why not have a little fun with it? April Fools Day isn’t until Sunday, but start your gag early to make this a well-executed joke, all while having a little bit of fun with it yourself. You deserve to live like a millionaire, even if it’s only for a weekend.

Friday, March 30^th

Pump yourself up for all of that cash you’ll be swimming in come 11P.M. when “your numbers are announced” by heading over to the Mid Manhattan branch of the New York Public Library and basking in their latest “Downton Abbey” themed exhibition. Imagine that Mr. Carson is waiting on you hand and foot as you read pithy quotes from Downton’s most alluring characters and browse photos from early 20^th century Britain, resembling that of our favorite PBS Masterpiece Classic show. NYPL Mid-Manhattan Branch, 544 5^th Ave. @ 42^nd St., 8A.M.-8P.M.

You’re going to have to have a drink in hand, set and ready for the big toast to your new multi-million dollar bank account come 11 P.M. so why not pop downtown after Downton to check out the brand spanking new (and sure to be popular) Randolph Beer on Broome Street. The swank new beer bar features 50 different craft beer and Modern American food with South East Asian and Australian influences (think beer battered oysters and maple bacon Brussels sprouts). Randolph Beer, 343 Broome Street between Bowery and Elizabeth Street.

Saturday, March 31^st

Now that your rolling in the dough, 540 million of it, you’re going to have to treat your family and friends by treating them to a lil’ something (this is the jokes of all jokes, you must pull it off by convincing them that you’re really a millionaire!). Don’t fret because this weekend Bloomingdale’s is making this joke easy on your pocket as they are holding their semi-annual Friends and Family Sale featuring 20% off almost all regular priced items as well as sale items. Arm yourself with the coupon and head over to the big Bloomie’s on 59^th.  1000 Third Ave, 10A.M. – 10P.M.

Now it’s time to act a fool by dancing a fool! Dress to impress and look your wealthiest as you head to the dance floor at PJ Bricks’ April Fools Fever. Even though you have “plenty to spend” their drink specials will make it easy on your wallet as you deceive your pals by buying them drinks all night long (2 for 1 beer special!) PLUS if you arrive at the top of the hour exactly, admission is free. PJ Bricks, Doors 9 P.M., 735 50^th Street and 10^th Ave.

Sunday, April 1^st

This is your big day! Your last day of being a millionaire and final opportunity to relish in being incredibly wealthy, so why not be snooty about it Shakespeare style?  Check out “Barred Music”: Sharespeare’s Fools Day at the Cornelia Street Café. Paul Hecht and Roberta Maxwell will be reading classics from the master himself, while Demetrius Spaneas plays some sax and pianist Jed Distler sooths with originally composted music. Sounds kind of divine, doesn’t it? Cornelia Street Café, 29 Cornelia Street, 6 P.M.

The time has come. The moment where you must sit your friends and family down and shout in their face “APRIL FOOLS!!!!” No better place to do it then the new Redwood Kitchenette & Bar, a kitschy take on the classic diner — 60’s Americana style — with mid-western themes. The quirky twists on diner classics and the actual Airstream seated within the joint will ground you and cause you to remember that this is probably the only type of vacation you can actually afford. Redwood Kitchenette & Bar, 102 8^th Ave. (between 16^th and 15^th St).

I’m sure you’re now exhausted from pulling off the best joke of all time, but it was fun being a millionaire while it lasted, right?

By Caitlin Colford

Party like it’s 1965 in the city where the Mad Men worked, smoked, drank and fooled around. After 17 long months, Mad Men is finally back. The fifth season kicks off with a two-hour premiere on Sunday, March 25, at 9 p.m.

Sunday’s episode is called A Little Kiss. Put on your finest 60s threads, blow yourself a little kiss in the mirror, then head out to soak up some authentic Madison Avenue flavor.

Friday night, March 23

Start your Mad Men weekend off on Madison Avenue itself. The Madison Club Lounge on Madison Avenue and 45th Street, has a clubby atmosphere straight out of the 60s. It’s in the Roosevelt Hotel, where Don Draper stayed in Season 2.

Saturday, March 24

Stop off for afternoon tea from 3 to 5 p.m. at the Two E, the swank lounge in the Hotel Pierre, the hotel where Sterling Cooper Draper Pryce set up temporary offices. When you finish your scones, pastries and tea sandwiches, make plans to come back to Two E on any Tuesday evening for special Mad-Men-inspired cocktails and live jazz.

Have a nightcap at P.J. Clarke’s, the saloon that has been around since 1884, just as the Mad Men did in Season 1

Sunday, March 25

Start the day with brunch, from 10 a.m. to 3:30 p.m., at Peacock Alley in the elegant Waldorf-Astoria Hotel, site of Draper’s meeting with Conrad Hilton. Have some raw oysters and champagne in honor of the Mad Men.

Tonight’s the night! You have a choice of two fab viewing parties, one at the Paley Center, a major organization for television-related events, and the other at the Carnegie Club, a swank cigar bar.

Wear your best retro finery, and enjoy a full evening of groovy Mad Men fun at the Paley Center for Media. Start the evening with authentic period cocktails at 8 p.m. From 9 to 11 p.m., watch the premiere live on a big screen along with your hosts from TV Guide Magazine. Enjoy real ads from the early 60s during program breaks. Test your Mad Men knowledge with trivia quizzes. Take home a poster to remember this special night.

Or soak up the lush atmosphere of the Carnegie Club, as you sip on your Mad Men cocktails and nibble on the  complimentary hors d’ouevres. The Carnegie Club is one of the city’s few cigar bars, where it’s legal to smoke  indoors. You’ll think you went back to the 60s in a time machine! The Mad Men event starts at 8 p.m., followed by the premiere episode shown live on the club’s three new large screen TVs.

By Marjorie Richter