What women in their 30s want

“Something old, something new.”  The saying that rings from every chapel, backyard reception and simple civil ceremony in New York City, celebrating the vow of marriage and eternal wedded bliss.  And with that charming ring comes the bride; with the bride come her bridesmaids dressed in colors, fabrics and textures of complementing dresses that are often worn once, then stored for safe keeping in the deep throes of a closet, never to see daylight again.  

As a sister of a soon-to-be-bride and a bridesmaid many times over, I can’t tell you how many times a seamstress has gushed over my taffeta or lace-spiked bridesmaid dress, insisting I can wear it again.  But how, and where?  Do you just toss on leggings underneath a tea length yellow chiffon number and call it a day, or is there more to it?  The answer is that there is more to it – if you’re willing to go the extra mile.  Designers like Coren Moore, who created the dresses for my sister’s wedding, have gotten hip to the multi-million dollar wedding industry’s demands for bridesmaid dresses that are more black tie than black plague and can be worn again as-is.  My dress, reminiscent of a raspberry sorbet dessert, will look great when paired with fishnets and black satin pumps for a winter holiday party come December – once I wear it down the aisle with nude pumps and a hydrangea bouquet in a few weeks, of course.

Other options include:  having your dress shortened (or lengthened with extra fabric from the manufacturer or otherwise); adding a belt or straps; lowering the neckline; and, having an overlay (think sheer fabrics, like mesh or lace) attached.  If getting frisky with a sewing machine isn’t your thing, a good tailor can do this for you for a fraction of the cost of the dress itself – just bring your own creativity – or you can find a design student from a school like Parsons or FIT to make your old dress their guinea pig.  Now, what to do about that bouquet?

With city pollution, stress and exhaustion (a lack of sleep from too many sample sales, perhaps?), it’s no wonder that women flock to makeup counters in groves, in search of the holy grail of makeup to cover everything from undereye bags to crows’ feet that run deeper than the Nile river.  As a late-20 something who prefers to nix liquid foundation in lieu of something subtle that can deliver, concealer is my oasis of epidermal faux-fection.  But with so many new products flooding the market that promise everything from perkier lids to perpetual bliss, how does a girl make her mark without maxing out her Amex?

My first stop was iQ Derma’s iDisguise ($45 at iqderma.com).  A multitasker since birth, I was intrigued to find out if its claims of being able to “even skin tone” and “neutralize undereye bags” would hold true in the brutal court of broad daylight.  Truth be told:  the iQ formula was lightweight and floated on top of the pesky fine lines that are beginning to develop under my eyes, and also made my skin appear brighter.  The “Medium” shade I ordered, though, appeared orange on my pale, olive skin.  But with only four shades to choose from, my options were limited.

For comparison, I tried another new breakthrough product:  Perfekt Beauty’s Eye Perfection Gel ($45 at Sephora).  The gel, inspired by Perfekt’s line of skin primers and treatments, felt more like a a cushy layer of frosting as I spread it into the deepest grove of my dark undereye circles.  As with iQ, the shade I chose, “Refreshed,” was too dark for my skin – and was left wishing there were more than three tints to choose from.  While the tube travels well in a purse, the product didn’t deliver; the only destination it has in the future is in my backup stash of makeup.  (Note:  there is an “Awake” shade, which is clear and acts more as an undereye treatment than concealer.)Neither product knocked my socks off, which leaves the justification of their respective price tags in limbo.  It also begs the question of whether I was attempting to conceal my flaws – or the shame in spending so much on makeup. 

In my all but futile attempt to save $12,000 I’ve had to give up some luxuries and scour the internet for deals. My latest mission: how to get a fabulous frock for just a few bucks? I know the traditional New York City discount haircuts, which include The Aveda Institute‘s $20 dos cut by semi-seasoned students and Bumble & Bumble‘s slightly edgier Monday night cuts, but decided there are some things a girl grows out of and cheapy haircuts is one of them. Plus, once I tried the whole $20 haircut and ended up sitting for three hours while the poor student slowly snipped away strand by strand.

I browsed a bit on Craigslist’s “free” tab and saw some dollarless offers, but each required sitting for a certain type of cut – bob, perm, with curly hair, with cowlick, without color, etc. I just wanted my long layerish cut shaped up minus the style restrictions. Free things don’t always come easy my friends, so if you aim to score something awesome without opening your pocketbook, some patience will be in order. And in Recessionville, USA, you better start looking a few weeks before you need the actual cut and act quickly if you see anything that might suit you. In the follow up emails you can evaluate the legitimacy, inquire into their experience and the salon and measure your instincts. But in the initial email just say your name, number and when you are available. They have a lot of responses and won’t reply if you ask a barrage of questions off the bat.

One Saturday morning, I saw an ad from a hairdresser asking for a long-haired model for promotional purposes. From my understanding, the salon was hurting for business and decided offering free cuts would increase marketing via word of mouth. It turns out the Oscar Bond Salon I visited around the turn of the millennium changed face to a Sam Brocato Salon where I was to meet the hairdresser.

I walked in and was greeted like any paying customer. They offered water, lemonade, coffee, tea and wine! (I had the wine, duh.) Then she lathered and massaged my noggin, questioned my hair’s aspirations during a very thorough consultation and began cutting. I was in and out in an hour, which was perfect since I went at lunch. It was wonderful and honstesly one of the better haircut and styling experiences I’ve had. It turns out, she has worked in that salon for six years.The following week, I had a friend who owns a nearby salon ask if I’d sit as a hair model for one of his employees just for a blow out. I was short on time that day, but reluctantly agreed. Well, when it comes to your locks, trust your gut. I ended up being there for two hours, one and a half of which was spent actually drying my fine mid-length hair. I for sure smelled it burning at one point. Needless to say, a free blow dry is probably something to pass on. If the person doesn’t even know how to blow dry hair, you don’t want to go to them.

However, if you see an ad for a hair model by a woman named Yasue Ida at Sam Brocato Salon, jump on that. She’ll rock your locks.

Complexion-wise, my teenage years were clear sailing:  good skin care habits, practiced since an early age, meant that I breezed past the plague of acne angst that affected so many of my peers.  You can imagine my surprise, then, when I became plagued with a palette of problems well beyond my control in my 20s.  Cystic breakouts, blackheads and discoloration replaced the smooth surface I had previously enjoyed – and appeared seemingly out of nowhere.  Like many adult women, acne, for me, is a problem that exists beyond puberty.  Shifts in hormones, lifestyle and age can all play a hand in this disruption; being someone who likes to tackle the problem at the roots and tired of hiding behind the cloak of concealer, I was quick to jump into my dermatologist’s chair for a diagnosis of this dilemma.

And saddened, oh TVC readers, I was, to learn that his best suggestion was to “keep my hands off my face” and “try Differin.”  Differin, if you’re wondering, is a retinoid-based product (similar to Retin-A) that costs $100 a month – with health insurance (really good health insurance, at that) – because it’s considered a “cosmetic” treatment (as opposed to my previous acne prescription, a topical antibiotic, which ran me $15 a year).  I gave it serious consideration – until the samples the doctor himself had given me to try caused my skin to erupt into a venerable Mount Vesuvius of pimples.

Since I don’t subscribe to the school of, “It’s got to get worse before it gets better,” and because I enjoy being a guinea pig for the sake of beauty, I dug deeper and tested a few other alternative treatment products worth sharing with The Vogue City.

iQ Derma Clear Skin Remedy System ($135 at iqderma.com)

“Ah,” I thought to myself.  “Another 3-step system that promises to cure every skin woe in the book.”  Having been warned of the dangers of everyone’s favorite mail order 3-step system – Proactiv – that my skin would become acclimated to such products and then go haywire if I stopped, I was wary to even test the waters.  Since I had nothing to lose but a couple of zits on my chin, I figured it was worth a shot.

Step 1, the gel cleanser, left a funky film behind on my skin that required a second washing by my stand-by Origins face wash.  Step 2, a salicylic acid treatment, did wonders for a crop of pesky whiteheads along my jawline and unlike its drugstore counterparts, didn’t dry out my skin.  It also helped fade some redness on my cheeks – bonus.  Step 3, a moisturizer, kept my skin moist, but not oily – but also contained more chemicals, compounds and additives than a transmission flush at Jiffy Lube.

The verdict?  I’ll stick with the salicylic treatment for now, used in between nights when I apply the prescription antibiotic.  Luckily, you can buy each product individually for far less than the cost of the full monty.

The ANSR Acne Starter Kit ($185 at ansr.com)

Shiver me lightbeams!  An at-home LED device, similar to the same one my dermatologist offers in his office at $150 a treatment, for under $200?  I was intrigued.  And so were my neighbors, I’m sure, when bright beams of blue (bacteria-destroying) and red (collagen-building) light shot across my window late at night.  The device is small, about the size of a deck of cards, and happily hums as you navigate the product around your face while in laser bliss.

I skipped the topical products and went straight for the LED, or light-emitting diode.  I knew I was to expect results “in about 2 months,” but I saw mild changes the very next day.  Deeply embedded nodules that were in my right cheek softened; mild scarring leftover from a bad breakout six months ago appeared lighter.  Within a week, my skin was softer, smoother, and more evenly toned.  I’m a cynic when it comes to this stuff, but I was honestly shocked, happily surprised and ready to call my mother to tell her I had met the love of my life.  Unfortunately, LED-human marriages aren’t legalized yet, so I’ll stick to using the ANSR once or twice a week for now.

The Clear Skin Prescription by Dr. Nicholas Perricone ($15.95 at Borders)

The “prescription” behind this treatment – which is a book – is really just common sense.  Eat well; drink a ton of water; incorporate yoga and exercise into your routine; reduce stress and get some sleep – I feel like my mother could have written this book in her sleep.  He (Dr. Perricone) does hit the nail on the head by presenting the idea of an anti-inflammatory diet, rich in omegas, antioxidants and other good-for-you vitamins and minerals.  Basically, a lot of salmon, berries and greens, and not so much McDonald’s.  My grocery bill jumped a bit – I don’t usually buy salmon or strawberries on a weekly basis – but that, combined with the cost of the book, cost less than the other two treatments I tried.  Plus, these are good habits that one can incorporate into her lifestyle for as long as she likes – no refilling or recharging required.

Above all, I learned that there is no magic wand or universal product that works for every single person.  Our skin, just like our personalities, is unique, and should be treated as such.  Treat it well, and you can rest assure that the only diva accessory you have to worry about are some killer stilettos – not a crop of acne on your forehead.