Goals

It’s easy to beat yourself up. You compare yourself to friends or family members, even complete strangers. Your eyes will glance from your outfit to the next person’s ensemble, or you’ll compare your dinner with your Instagram feed’s never ending supply of food shots. Maybe you feel like you’re not moving up the ladder as quickly as you want, or that your love life could use some work.

We all do it. We all critique ourselves harshly, and with much more disdain than we’d ever consider judging another person with. We could tell you to just stop being so hard on yourself—and we are telling you to do that—but we also want to share this list with you.

It’s a list comprised of 20 reasons why you’re doing better than you think you are. On it: you question yourself, you can afford your morning cup of coffee, you have multiple outfits in your closet, and you’ve lost relationships.

• You paid the bills this month.
• You question yourself.
• You have a job.
• You have time to do something you enjoy.
• You are not worried about where your next meal is coming from.
• You can eat because you enjoy it.
• You have one or two truly close friends.
• You could afford a subway ride, cup of coffee, or the gas in your car this morning.
• You’re not the same person you were a year ago.
• You have the time and means to do things beyond the bare minimum.
• You have a selection of clothing at your disposal.
• You can sense what isn’t right in your life.
• If you could talk to your younger self, you would be able so say: “We did it, we made it out, we survived that terrible thing.”
• You have a space of your own.
• You’ve lost relationships.
• You’re interested in something.
• You know how to take care of yourself.
• You’re working toward a goal.
• But you’re not uncompromisingly set on anything for your future.
• You’ve been through some crap.

Read the full list here.

By Wendy Rose Gould

Image credit: Shutterstock.com

Coming from a girl who spent her afternoons shopping at Barneys and tanning on her terrace, even I realized there was time for change. I wanted to become a person I could be proud of, not just make my parents proud, but myself. After 10 years of running my first line of jewelry, and after a tragedy too painful to discuss, I felt as if my life was slipping away from me. I decided it was time to change grow up, and take a new outlook on life.

After dabbling with marketing jobs, I returned to my true passion of design.  Launching a line of bracelets with my friend was what motivated me.  Its not about being selfish in life, but about putting yourself first sometimes, and making YOURSELF a priority again.  When did it become ok we should ask to let others needs always come before ours.  Whether it be a boyfriend, a best friend even family.  Letting go of ones hopes and dreams is a sad reality many people face as they get older.

I joined the gym, workouts begin at 6:00 am, sometimes earlier.  I closed the door to the terrace and opened the door to my future.  A truly motivated person at heart, dragging myself out of bed came easily. Setting goals isn’t always easy and dreams can be hard to follow. Giving yourself a daily routine can be rigid at times, but you to begin to create a balance in your life. A true sense of self comes through hard work and determination.  The gym was a good start, that leads to a road of happiness.

As the weight came off, my tune of life changed.  I felt confident again.  Newly single a sense of worth began to wash over me, and I was ready to reemerge myself into the jungle we all know as dating.  Not easy to say the least, (where did the time go)?  It was all so much easier just a few years ago!  But with the support of friends and time I began to set the goals for myself I had always wanted.  It takes a lot of time and work, but dreams can still be followed.

Forming a support team of friends who want the best for you is key.  The ones that tell you that black dress is too tight and that maybe you could try accessorizing just a tiny bit more.  The ones who tell you to wipe off the red lipstick, and hit the gym.  If there not telling you how it really is, they should probably hit the road. Everyone makes mistakes in life, but learning and growing from them is all we humans can do.

Picking up that great book again, and letting go of the drama.  Reducing stress and enjoy being a woman again.  The power of change comes from within.  Hard work never goes un noticed.

By Andrea Barna