Cyber Stalker Impulse Replaced with Shopping One
There should be just one website that people use to google people’s names – to find them, or to put it less-mildly, cyber stalk them from the comfort of your home office. I mean, we all do it. Hell, I just did it today. I googled myself, and then I googled a couple other people. Ha! That’s what it feels like, liberating. Like looking at people from behind a dark window. You think it’s safe. But that’s the part of the movie where the camera pans back and someone grabs you from behind (and not in a sexy way).
So, listen. This site I was talking about? As soon as you click ‘search’, it should take you to another site that says something long the lines of, “Sofia (insert your name instead) you are crazy. You don’t truly want to induldge in pointless torture via the likes of this. No matter what you do or don’t find on any of these searches you’ll feel restless and unhappy with the results.”
But since there was is currently no site like that, I now find myself sitting here, late at night, feeling both restless and unhappy. Also, a little thirsty. God, I hate memories sometimes.
Now I feel addicted. It’s a toxic sickness. I mean, why stop now? Why not google ex-boyfriends, the rival you had in high school, your old best friend from 8th grade who stole your boyfriend and favorite sweater? The people who are in your life are the people you want in your life. And the people who’ve come and gone? There has to be a reason they’re not in your life anymore. The Internet lets you lurk and spy and the entire thing has to be very unhealthy, maybe even dangerous.
So what the hell do you do?
What am I supposed to do when it’s late at night and everyone I know is asleep and would kill me (or at least be really irked) if I called them to chat about a not-really mental fritz fest, I don’t have any popcorn to make, or any DVD that can keep my interest (Netflixes, come faster please).
This may be something that some (especially guys) would call shallow and stupid. But when I get the urge to do something as self-destructive as google someone’s name where I know I’ll be upset by doing, I’m going to online shop. I’m going to make myself feel better, instead of letting people from the past and my associations with them pull me down into a weird place of uneasiness and sadness. I’d rather be joyful and in a pretty dress!
Here’s what I want:
Nanette Lepore Women’s Rocksteady Cotton Dress ($235.00) at bloomingdales. Because I still want more summer dresses and I didn’t love the Nanette Lepore perfume I tried recently, but I love Nanette Lepore anyway.
Lauren by Ralph Lauren V-Neck Sleeveless Dress ($159.00) at Macys. Because I can wear this with anything and it’s powerful but I can change it up with different shoes, clutches, and jewelry.
French Connection Women’s Cluster Floral ($168.00) at bloomingdales. Because this is the type of shirt I’d normally talk myself out of buying. It’s white, so I could spill on it – and not everyone from far away can see the pretty details…but who cares!
Much love – and much shopping!
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